Like you aren't gloating about what you've done to me.

I enjoyed my trip to Harvard very much, thank you for asking.

I think you are jealous, Nicolas, because the only American establishment that would ever accept you as a speaker/scholar would be Liberty University. Or maybe McDonalds.

That article was appalling. Couldn't you see the contempt for you and your words? You and I may disagree on many things, Dominique, but when it's a case of France or a Frenchman being held up to ridicule, I hope we can always close ranks against the slurs.

As to the likelihood that I myself might one day join an American academic establishment or think tank, you forget that my economic views make me a much more likely candidate than you are.

Indeed. The Americans too love to go in debt, like you did when you were in Bercy.

You're a fine one to talk. Didn't Besson jump ship because of a disagreement over your financial programme? How do you plan to pay for all the things you've promised the voters? Maybe you'll ask Jacques for a loan?

My programme and yours cost about the same... Need I say more?

...only Nicolas doesn't criticize me for France's high defecit and then, when I try to reduce it, criticize me for not spending the money on social welfare...

At least he's only a traitor, not a coward.

I'm a good politician.

A good politician who will get elected.

That requires presenting the same basic truth in ways that might slightly differ each time - not that you'll know anything about getting elected, of course.

Sego, ma chere, you have just demonstrated why I have never put myself up for election or wanted to be a 'good politician'. I value my integrity too much.

Well, as long as that integrity of yours brings the Socialists to power like it did in 1997, do feel free to continue. Keep up the good work!

I so would have beaten you if I'd run. That's why you were all scared of me!

Don't mistake gratitude for envy :D

You are jealous that I am so Gaulliste and you are not.

De Gaulle wasn't afraid to run in various elections.

De Gaulle never brought the Socialist Party to power.

De Gaulle wrote real books, that were published by real éditeurs, not like those flimsy tomes you paid to see in print.

De Gaulle never courted presidential candidates from opposition parties (granted, they were all half-bald men in their 70s back then, and certainly no way as charming as I am).

De Gaulle didn't spend half his life abroad.

De Gaulle would never have allowed photographers to shoot him half-naked on the beach, he had another idea of France's dignity and of that of her rulers.

The list could go on and on...

My books were published at Gallimard, thank you very much.

What does it matter that I spent some time abroad? Similarly, I've been meaning to ask, what do Bayrou's origins matter either? Not very socialiste of you, Sego!

And as to the topless shots, just think about the happiness I brought to many in France who needed cheering up.

Books? Plural?

Do you want a stuttering Béarnais as a President? I know I don't. And so do the French people.

A topless De Gaulle would have provoked several waves of suicides, that's true.

But, what difference does it make if he is béarnais? Surely it is his inability to govern that you should think about instead.

Mes livres:

1. L'Esprit de sacrifice (Napoleon bio)
2. Le Cri de la Gargouille
3. Le Requin et la mouette
4. Eloge des Voleurs du Feu

not forgetting what I'm writing at the moment.

Our present Republic is the spiritual descendant of the twin kingdoms of France and Navarre. I am not partial to seeing an obcure hobereau béarnais at the head of France, and any self-respecting Frenchman would feel that way too. They'd much rather elect someone who, say, was brought up in the Vosges and has had extensive contact with the vital, central part of France that is the Poitou-Charentes.

All my apologies - I forgot that you've been PM for a while now and that publishers aren't any less brown-nosed than other professions.

My books were published all before I came to Matignon. While I know you may enjoy criticizing my policies to make yourself look better, ma chere, I did not know this extended to my writing talent.

Now, now, ma chere, don't you think this kind of "ethnic" prejudice belongs centuries ago? And please, if being in Poitou-Charentes is enough to get you elected, Raffarin would be running. Alors, oui, I know, he cannot run, only wheeze and stagger, mais vous voyez ou je veux venir.

Oui, à compte d'auteur!

It's not ethnic, it's historic.

The last time we had a Béarnais head of state, it came at the end of a bloody civil war. Let's exercise some caution now we have the hindsight of experience.

Et non, je ne vois absolument pas où vous voulez en venir. Raffarin was PM and PMs never get elected right after their mandates. That too is historic.

Perhaps you should read a bit more and write a lot less?

The Wars of Religion were quite a long time ago, ma chere. Monsieur Bayrou no longer represents the Huguenots. If this is your way of attacking him, you really must be worried about your own campaign!

No, your 'friend' Jospin had a little problem about that, didn't he? Thanks to me, at least, anyway.

He's not representing the Hugenots, he's a Catholic with six children and a wife to visit whenever he's not with his mistress, but he still represents the sodding Béarnais and the French won't have any of it.

And your "mentor" Chirac as well. Thanks to Mitterrand.

Jacques got there in the end. A lesson and inspiration for us all, Ségo.

But, really, do you not consider the Béarnais to be French by now? Do you see Nicolas as a Hungarian/Rumanian?

At Hamburger University?

*stares* Very funny. Now why don't you go off and annoy Mme Royal? Dominique is perfectly capable of being insulting without help from you.

Hi all!

Looks good! Very useful, good stuff. Good resources here. Thanks much!

Bye